Rape

We wonder if parents ever sit down with their sons to talk about rape. We wonder if they ever talk to them about consent and what not to do to girls because women are given many lessons from the time we are old enough to comprehend spoken words.

You are taught to watch your drink all times. You are taught not to accept drinks from men, and then you are taught not to drink with men, and then you get raped and they say maybe it was because your dress was too short.

You are taught not to talk to strangers and not to accept gifts from men. You are then taught not to walk at night because you could get raped and then you visit your cousins one day and the boy you grew up with rapes you. And then you visit your aunt one day and her husband rapes you and you are left wondering, which rule didn’t I follow?

Like every woman who has been taught what to do not to get raped you follow every rule in the book. You wear long dresses. You make sure you get home early. You make sure never touch alcohol. You avoid hanging out with men and you hang out with girls only and then one day you fall in love and you get married to the man you hope to have a family with and he rapes you because he believes your body is his.

Women are raped by their friends. Girls are raped by their fathers. Children by their uncles and wives by their husbands and rape is still framed as a failure on our part. All focus goes into teaching women to not get raped but zero on teaching men to stop being rapists.

Someone needs to be teaching men that the female body does not belong to them to violate as they please.

Our bodies are ours and they need to be taught that with the energy the world uses to teach us what to do to avoid sexual violence.